Being Alone: Pain or Glory?
Hello Readers!!! Thank you for showering all your love and taking out your precious time to read my articles. The response to my last article Mental Health was a great one and unexpected.
I had a lot of discussion on mental health with my friends and relatives but, what caught my attention was when my friend discussed the difference between Loneliness and Solitude.
Are they the same or different or similar? Well!! Let’s have a look at it.
Paul Tillich has rightly quoted: ‘Loneliness expresses the pain of being alone & Solitude expresses the glory of being alone.’
Loneliness is a negative state of mind marked by a sense of isolation. A person might be with others and still feel lonely. But solitude is the state of being alone without being alone. Solitude is when a person wants to be alone and spend time with themselves.
Coming to solitude, have we ever wondered what gives rise to this kind of attitude that a person likes to be in a state of solitude? What I believe is that it is the loneliness that a person adapts to such a kind of behavior.
When a person is lonely, two things happen: either the person responds positively or negatively to it.
When a person responds negatively to it, he gets frustrated, irritated, anxious. This type of behavior leads to sadness, depression, and all the negative emotions.
But, when a person responds positively in a way that a person finds this as an opportunity to explore themselves, this behavior leads to all the positive emotions and a state of solitude arises.
Solitude allows a person to spend some time with themselves, to do what they want to do, but if we go deep, isn’t this a behavior which is not good in the long run.
Solitude can be restorative and replenishing, providing psychological benefits in terms of stress reduction, understanding the self, and in identifying triggers of stress and other harmful states.
Protecting time for self-reflection and adopting a mindful approach can lead to an enhanced sense of wellbeing. It can also be effective in preventing relapse into depression.
For how long we will run from the relationships when we will start investing in the relationships?
Solitude tears your self-belief and self-esteem. Both self-belief and self-esteem form one’s ego. Solitude brings you your thoughts about yourself. If you are away from people and society just for the sake of it and flaunting it as solitude, it won’t help. Rather, one can quickly spiral downwards with either thinking too highly of themselves or thinking about yourself as a piece of shit. Both are ultimately facade and this type of solitude is a waste.
Don’t you think that we have made this solitude so glamorous that we have stopped building relationships and nourishing them? People have this dicey notion that everyone’s bad around them and they need solitude to sort themselves which is not always the case, right? I agree that there comes a moment where we are done with everyone and everything, but don’t you think that should not close your doors to build new relationships and communicate what we feel. After all, we humans are called social animals for some reason.
Honestly, solitude looks easy to handle but it takes steel in your heart to be with yourself and your thoughts. Not everyone can handle that and become extremely fragile. It is a good practice to take out some time for yourself but what is most important, is to invest in the people you care about. Don’t let go of the people before its too late.
I know what you all must be thinking: Is it wrong to take out some time and spend with yourself?
No, absolutely not, but there should be a right balance between your ‘Me time’ and ‘Social Life’. Don’t get yourself involved with yourself that much that you are left with no relationships and don’t get involved yourself with others so that people stop valuing you. Take out time for both: Time to know yourself and time to know others around you.
