It’s Your Fault… Is It?

Being a woman is tough!! Really really tough.

From gender biasness to all sorts of compromises, a woman bears it all.

From bleeding 6 days every month to bearing a child, a woman undergoes a lot of changes, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Hold on! I am not someone who is here to talk about feminism.

But being a woman in our society is not less than a crime.

Whenever a woman steps out of her house, she is being looked upon with such evil eyes as she has committed some crime. They are told to not step outside as it is not safe for them.

Talking about the safety of women, let’s talk about them being safe at home. Are they safe in their homes? I think we already know the answers.

Have you ever realized what a constant pressure or fear she undergoes?

Why women are always told to behave properly, laugh decently, dress subtly. WHY???

‘Sit properly, this is not a way a girl should sit’, these are not the words of a man, but the same gender, the elder women of our society who still believes that certain behavior of a girl can make her vulnerable to the eyes of evil men.

Why women are always told to dress properly in public, is it because men have very few dress choices, or is it something else?

And if it is something else then is it just the dress or women have given men in our society that much freedom that they can do whatever they can do. Being a man is the license to do anything, right?

They are free to harass a woman whenever and however they want. And if you blame our clothes then let me tell you, a small kid has also been harassed and an old woman has also been harassed. And if we see around us, there must be no woman left, on this planet, who is not being harassed.

And by harassment, I do not only mean physically, I mean mentally and emotionally too.

In a modern era, where women are treated equally to men, just give it a thought if women are really treated equally?

Women are way more independent than before but they are not as independent as society thinks. Their choices are dependent on others. A woman is not allowed to stay out for late.

Talking about harassment, how many women are free to talk to their family that they are being harassed?

Please raise your hands if you are free to do? Most of us are not. You know why? Because women already know the responses and reactions of their family members. Some of them are: Don’t stay out till late, don’t step out alone from next time or if possible don’t step out only, maine to pehle hi kaha tha dhang ke kapde pehen ke ja, be careful from next time and so on….

How many women are there, whose family has asked them to fight from next time whoever dares to do such a thing? Very few I guess!!

Are these the reasons women are not able to tell their family that they are being harassed? Women start feeling that it is their fault, but is it really?

Why women are told to behave, talk and dress properly? Why men are not told to behave and talk properly?

Why men are allowed to stay out till late but women are not and in case if she does there is constant monitoring of her movement.

Will the so-called society ever realize what a woman goes through & how much pressure it creates for a woman to talk about it?

Why a movement like “MeToo” is needed, to come and speak about it openly?

WHAT WE CAN DO??

Most of the things are solved when discussed. It becomes really difficult to be under constant fear and then stay with it the entire life.

Women need to communicate as well as support each other. They need to let these issues out. Women have to be each other’s confidante. Keeping these things to yourself will not solve the problems. Women need to understand that equal restrictions need to be imposed on men.

Men need to understand that being a man does not give them the right to harass a woman. They need to understand that being a man, it is their responsibility to respect women and make them feel safe.

Women especially elderly women, instead of telling young girls to sit properly and seeding a fear, they should make them learn self-defense. So, that they can become confident to face this cruel world and do what they want to do and wear what they want to wear. Most importantly, teach your son and brother to respect women and not to judge them or think that it is their birthright to act as Khullaa saand. Women need to understand that it is not their fault. They need to come out of this trauma and fear and fight back. Stop pitying and blaming yourself and come out strong.

Stop being Nazuk kali and being the one who needs protection and security.

Start being a woman giving protection and safety. Be confident and start loving and believing yourself because change starts within you. Show the world that you wear a crown not just because you are your dad’s princess but because you are the QUEEN and no matter what, no one can take off the crown from your head.